As a loud and proud Nora Ephron / Emily Henry / Jane Austen girlie, I know a thing or two about romantic comedies. I find the predicability of the genre greatly comforting. Meet cute, will they / won’t they, they will, just kidding they won’t, just kidding they do! Everyone lives happily ever after, exchanging witty banter and never miscommunicating again as they ride off into the sunset.
So here it is, my official ranking of romance tropes. A few things to keep in mind. These tropes are not mutually exclusive. They can be layered onto each other. For example, Emily Henry’s Happy Place is a fake dating second chance romance.
This is not a complete list of tropes. I can (and likely will) dedicate future posts to this oh so important topic. To start us off, I have picked six I felt like other, more niche tropes (like celebrity dating, small town/big city, and age gap) could be layered onto. We can get into those and plenty more at a future time.
Also please note, all the books listed under each section are books I’ve read and recommend, even if I don’t always love the trope they fall under.
6. Accidental Pregnancy
I avoid this trope the way I avoid an IRL accidental pregnancy. At all costs. I’m sorry, but this is just the worst trope. It simply is. Two people hook up. She gets pregnant, and they decide to give it a go, and in the process of nesting, they fall madly in love. Hard pass. I read romance as an escape, and that situation just sounds TO ME like a nightmare.
That said, I accidentally read one book in this genre, mostly because the cover was cute and at the top of it read “chaotic, messy, and madly in love” and that part sounded FUN! I thought to myself, okay! I often feel chaotic and messy and EYE want to be madly in love! And so I picked up the book. And I actually did like the book a lot. Almost against my will. The book in question is Lizzie Blake’s Best Mistake by Mazey Eddings. An exception to my rule, which I chalk that up to the fact that Eddings is an excellent writer, and her characters are so full of heart and charming, I simply had no choice but to fall madly in love with them.
In Lizzy Blake’s Best Mistake, Eddings writes “If yellow was a sound, (Rake) thought, it would be her laugh. Bright and booming, warming and joyful. Different varieties ranging from sunbeams and lemon zest to the soft puffs of golden wattle.” Yeah, sorry I am going to enjoy reading that. Even if the context around it is my personal hell.
Film examples include: Knocked Up, Juno, Look Both Ways, Waitress
5. Fake Dating
Simply put, this is when two characters who are not actually in a romantic relationship pretend to be. Maybe it’s so they can convince an ex they’ve moved on. Or so friends stop setting them up on awful dates. Or maybe its a celebrity PR relationship. Take you pick, but just know it isn’t real when they go in and by the end there is absolutely no faking it, they are in love.
I know this is a hot take placing this trope so far down on my list, but hear me out. Fake Dating is almost always accompanied by a highly insecure female main character. As soon as she starts to catch feelings, without fail she starts thinking, “he could never like ME! He’s just pretending. I’m disgusting.” Ladies, STAND UP. Get some self esteem, I beg you. Of course he likes you, I scream at the pages as I read! He’s pretending to date you, and men do not do that if they aren’t at least A LITTLE interested. (I assume, no personal real world experience with this one. Actually, Men, please sound off in the comments. WOULD you do this?)
Film examples include: The Proposal, Pretty Woman, The Perfect Date, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, Holidate
Book examples include: The Bodyguard by Katherine Center, How To Fake It In Hollywood by Ava Wilder, The Soulmate Equation by Christina Lauren, Happy Place by Emily Henry, Yours Truly by Abby Jimenez, The Plus One by Mazey Eddings
4. Friends to Lovers
Next up we have friends to lovers, wherein two friends have secretly pined for one another for years, but never said how they really felt for fear or ruining the friendship. Maybe it’s been an issue of timing; one is in a relationship while the other is single. Maybe they think the other just doesn’t see them that way and never could. Fill in the blank excuse here, they never say I love you. My big issue with this trope? I don’t buy it.
Take People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry, for example. You mean to tell me two people who are attracted to each other go on vacation JUST THE TWO OF THEM together annually for years and NOTHING happens? No, that’s where you lose me.
I know my personal experience is not indicative of a universal experience, but I just don’t believe that a man would really sit around in love with his best friend for years and not drunkenly act on it.
I do want to make a point to note that you could argue my favorite rom-com, When Harry Met Sally, is a friends to lovers story. To some extent, sure. But they were not friends that pined over each other. Famously, Harry Burns believes men and women can’t even BE friends. So this is sort of a moot point. Furthermore, when Harry and Sally realize they are attracted to each other, they act on it.
Nora Ephron wrote “I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible” not “I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you don’t tell them because maybe they don’t feel that way about you and it’ll ruin the friendship.” SIGH.
Film examples include: She’s The Man, 13 Going On 30, Something Borrowed, Friends With Benefits, No Strings Attached, The Duff, My Best Friend’s Wedding
Book examples include: The Cheat Sheet by Sarah Adams, PWMOV by Emily Henry, Love and Other Words by Christina Lauren
3. Second Chance Romance
I have a firm “no dating exes” policy in my real life, but I’m a sucker for a second chance romance. In this trope, two people who used to date — and most likely broke up not because they do not love each other, but because they miscommunicated beyond belief — find each other again and get a second chance with one another. Maybe they fall back in love, maybe they never fell out of love. But this time, they say the things they left unsaid the first time around and make it work.
I find reading these sorts of books to be so cathartic. Who doesn’t dream of an ex finding them years later to tell them all they way they messed up and how nothing that went wrong had anything to do with you and you were perfect all along? The closest I’ve come to this happening in real life is when someone I dated for a couple months drunkenly texted me from a wedding a month after we stopped seeing each other to tell me, “I’m sorry. You’re perfect. It really was not anything. Like you really are the best.” I asked what happened, and he never responded. Definitely my soulmate *insert enormous eye roll here*
All this to say, this trope scratches an itch for those of us who dream of clear, direct communication. Who just want to know where we stand and to feel supported and cared for even when times get tough or life goals change. Huge asks, I know *insert another huge eye roll*
Film examples include: Sweet Home Alabama, Before Sunset
Book examples include: Happy Place by Emily Henry, Meet Me At The Lake by Carley Fortune, Every Summer After by Carley Fortune, Same Time Next Summer by Annabel Monaghan, Something Wilder by Christina Lauren, Love And Other Words by Christina Lauren
2. Grumpy x Sunshine
Ooh I love this one. Not dissimilar from the trope holding spot number one, here we have one person in the relationship who is sunshine personified. The other is a brooding storm cloud. But together they balance out. Think Roy Kent and Keely Jones in Ted Lasso. Or Nick Miller and Jessica Day from New Girl. Or Harry Burns and Sally Albright in When Harry Met Sally. Their entire opening car ride scene is a perfect example of this trope. “Yes, basically I’m a happy person and I don’t see that there’s anything wrong with that” runs on a loop in my mind constantly.
More often than not, with two heterosexual main characters, the female character is the sunshine, and the male character is a grumpus who only lights up for her. But I honestly love a golden-retriever boyfriend x black-cat girlfriend like Nate Hawkins and Anastasia Allen in Hannah Grace’s Icebreaker even more. She gets to be every imperfect shade of herself and he loves her not in-spite of that but because of it? Yes please.
Film examples include: When Harry Met Sally, Enchanted
Book examples include: Book Lovers by Emily Henry, The Soulmate Equation by Christina Lauren, Icebreaker by Hannah Grace.
1. Enemies to Lovers
Hands down the best trope. Really not even a contest. This is where two characters start off at odds with one another and as they spend time together, they overcome their misconceptions about one another and fall in love. My personal favorite version of this trope is when he has low-key been obsessed with her the whole time. Because he should be. I don’t want to read a story where he actually hates her. Misogyny in my escapism? Gross.
Someone on TikTok suggested if this trope is your favorite it means you dream of someone seeing you at your worst and still choosing you over and over. Not going to lie, I felt a bit attacked when that video showed up on my FYP. The TikTok algorithm really said FOR YOU.
This trope also has passion and big feelings baked in and as a big feelings cancer-sun girl, I’m especially here for that. Chris Pine and Anne Hathaway saying “I loathe you. I loathe you more.” Then kissing and falling into a fountain in Princess Diaries 2? Peak cinema.
Film examples include: Pride & Prejudice, You’ve Got Mail, Moonstruck, Clueless, 10 Things I Hate About You, Leap Year, Just Like Heaven, Princess Diaries 2: A Royal Engagement, Bridget Jone’s Diary
Book examples include: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, Book Lovers by Emily Henry, Beach Read by Emily Henry, Icebreaker by Hannah Grace, Just My Type by Falon Ballard, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas
Honorable mention to the Forced Proximity / One Bed Trope which can (and should!) be layered onto all of these to make any story better. This is where characters are, for reasons beyond their control, stuck sharing sleeping quarters.
Josie Silver’s One Night on the Island has me considering flying to Ireland every few months in hopes that my soulmate and I might get double booked into a tiny cottage just as huge storm hits and we can’t leave. Potential claustrophobia aside, it sounds kind of great, honestly.
Do you agree or disagree with my rankings? Let me know your thoughts, favorite and least favorite tropes, etc in the comments! And as always you can find me on Instagram and TikTok. Come say hi.